my head spins
and i reach for the wall
something to grab onto
light refracts into blue halos
my vision crackles
i feel like i am
watching an old cassavetes film
my knees give out and i collapse
in the cold corner
but i don't
remember collapsing
just sinking
waking up feeling
like if i stop trying
i am going to throw up
i feel disconnected
nauseous
embarrassed
i sit and drink my warm water
and try to regain
some reference of stabilty
this may take a while
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hear you
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